Back in 2013 I remember starting at Ideaschool as a level 5 student in the Batchelor of Visual Arts and Design programme. It was a warm February day and although I knew a few people from my time as a student in the certificate program (2012), I was knee knocking scared, so many questions and doubts about my place at such an amazing place, I was in hyperdrive with equal amounts of excitement and dread! And then came the ‘getting to know you’ exercises, OMG it was horrible! For someone who is basically a bit of a loner, shy and awkward around a lot of people, I was suddenly thrust into a group of peers at the same stage or further along and in the company of an unknown tutor/teacher, I was petrified.
That was the day I met Wellesley Binding, if I had been scared before that then I was in for a shock, this terrifyingly intelligent and sharp man made me realise that worse was to come. Unfortunately for me I tend to talk too much about nothing when I’m feeling stressed and I reckon if I made a scratch on his conscious then I’m sure I would have been referred to as the ‘idiot’! At least for that first year we didn’t have a lot to do with WB (as I started to call him). But for me it made a huge impression and I was sure that if I had to have him as a teacher he would quickly realise what a fraud I was and kick me out of art school with a swift boot… now I realise that it’s good to feel like that, it made me rise to the challenges faced over the last two years and has made me a better artist and even a better person. I can’t deny there have been others that have impacted on me as an artist and person but it’s WB who has over the last six weeks challenged me to consider what kind of artist I really am and where I want to go after I leave Ideaschool.
Six weeks seems like an inappropriately short amount of time to come to such a point but reflecting back I can see that the previous two years have been leading up to this moment, I knew what I want to do and why but articulating that was hard. Becoming an intern for WB has been priceless and I will always be grateful for those who considered me worthy of such an opportunity, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
So here we are six weeks into the first project of the year and in the middle of a term break, besides working at my paying ‘job’ I have plans to catch up on school work and try to continue my own painting practice. From tomorrow I plan to catch up on documenting the internship but for now I have a couple of images to share with you all. Images of a painting I started on over Christmas and New Year 2014/15, prior to returning to school.
This piece is a subconscious rendering of my deepest feelings and thoughts about what kind of artist I am and how I express that to others. If I may, then by returning to the core of my creative practice I began to make marks that express restraint and repetition while emphasising the materiality of paint, and the connectivity between the paint, surface and myself, a sublime moment/s that was both quiet and powerful. My expectation or plan was not to paint a ‘finished’ piece but to place a brush in my hand and let things happen in an instinctive and organic way, hence there appears to be several ‘paintings’ vying for supremacy.
Finally I finished in something of a rush and to date the painting remains in my studio at school, covered by a drop cloth, I had plans to hang it in order to ‘listen’ to it and consider things but for some reason it seems too overwhelming to hang. Like it would swamp the things I’m currently doing in my studio for the internship… I still look at it now and then but only when I’m alone. Anyhow I have started another painting, at home, it seems quieter and has a very different feel but (dare I say it) I think an equally intense being, more on that later, keep posted.